voicesinmyhead

baitnswitchblade:

chainsandshipsexciteme:

sexting-derek-hale:

mynerdinessoverwhelmsme:

sexting-derek-hale:

Wait do American people not call their friends mate?? Is this a thing???

Yup. I’m sure some do but mostly people just say friend. Which is boring but whatever.

Wait so you go up to your friends and be like “Hello friend.”

we use names

Or dipshit

(via kendershire)

fishingboatproceeds:

shreksforthememories:

and then they didnt put her on the final list

Disappointing.

fishingboatproceeds:

shreksforthememories:

and then they didnt put her on the final list

Disappointing.

(via kendershire)

How was your day, Paul?

(Source: manningsarah, via pryiatsetang)

thebuttfuckingbelievers:

alt-j:

caseyaunthony:

i dont get this picture

obviously some sloppy fuck left their orange peels on the ground and Hillary Clinton happened to be skating by and slipped on them. Not to hard to understand. She still smilin doe

Hillary Clinton

thebuttfuckingbelievers:

alt-j:

caseyaunthony:

i dont get this picture

obviously some sloppy fuck left their orange peels on the ground and Hillary Clinton happened to be skating by and slipped on them. Not to hard to understand. She still smilin doe

Hillary Clinton

(Source: nearlyvintage, via marybottybepoppinsg)

doctoratomic:

Genre Swap » Orphan Black as a Comedy

(via pryiatsetang)

heterophobicgoat:

stupidandreckless:

NOOOO NO NO NONO FUCK FUCK  FUCKIG CBS IS TELLING WOMEN NOT TO REPORT SEXUAL HARASSMENT BECAUSE IT WILL “DAMAGE THEIR CAREERS” and “HARASSMENT IS AN UNFORTUNATE PART OF CLIMBING THE LADDER” I AM SO ANGRY THEY ARE LITERALLY TURNING SEXUAL HARASSMENT INTO A NORM THIS IS NOT OKAY

This is an actual article and I’m still having a hard time believing it’s real.

Lol I like how a woman wrote it lol

(via karensdisciple)

Actual Quotes from my Dad (An English Teacher)
Dad: Why the hell did you put a comma there?
Dad: Do you even know what a participial phrase is?
Dad: Omg. He's like my favorite character of all time.
Dad: Who should I dress up as for the movie premier?
Dad: Hey are you awake? I know it's late, but you read Animal Farm, right? Yeah. I need you to read this report. I can't tell if I am just super tired or if this is actual bullshit.
Dad: Alesha wouldn't be able to spell 'definitely' right if wrote it down for her. She would fucking erase it and then write 'defiantly', because she doesn't care. I hate her.
Dad: I need you to bake brownies. I lost a bet.
Dad: Omg. You cannot ship me with Gilcher. You know I don't like tattoos and he's like twenty-five. And for Christ's sake, he teaches math.
Dad: Omg. Gilcher said the funniest thing today.
Dad: Mrs. Ashworth and I have decided to start a band. It'll be called Great Expectations.
Dad: It's like you didn't read the fucking book.
Dad: Okay. So this week you're reading this book I stole from Mrs. Ashworth's. It's like sixty pages long, but you'll love it.
Dad: *puts books on my bed for me to read everyday and demands that I read them*
Dad: My son doesn't like reading. I have not only failed him, but society. You aren't my son. Leave.
Dad: Okay. So you're getting books for Christmas. All of you. I get discounts on them since I'm a teacher, and since I'm a teacher, it's all I can afford, so...
Dad: Fucking standardized testing can go fuck itself in the ass.
Dad: I have to teach for the required testing instead of what they really need to know.
Dad: Fuck the government.
Dad: Fuck the school board.
Dad: Close the door.
Dad: Charles Dickens was so fucking pretentious, and I hate him, but he also caused change, but he's such a Dick. Ha. DICKens.
Dad: I love puns.
Dad: People who say sarcasm is the lowest form of humor are assholes.
Dad: Please shut up.
Dad: Catching Fire was the worst book but the best movie and that feels weird.
Dad: I wouldn't get so mad when you call me at school if you didn't change your ringtones to inappropriate rap music.
Dad: I fucking hate Alesha. She asked what countries were apart of Austria-Hungary today and I almost told her to get out.
Dad: You cannot visit my school in a dress that short. There are boys there.
Dad: Barbra Parks is fucking Queen.
Dad: I need you to make me a good, relaxing playlist for silent reading. I'm too lazy.
Dad: If I have to watch two of my students grind on each other at one more dance, I will kill them both.
Dad: They act like I care what they think.
Dad: I hate homework.
Dad: I have decided to become a politician.
Dad: What's the one book with the guys and the one kills the other and the chick without a name who dies and the short angry man? Mouseman? Oh my fucking gosh. Of Mice and Men. I have failed.
upclosefromafar:

jessicaslittledreamworld:

This is beyond important

This applies to every parent.

upclosefromafar:

jessicaslittledreamworld:

This is beyond important

This applies to every parent.

(Source: hadeiadel, via wtfitisnotnick)